Recovery: the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

It's amazing how fast your body heals after delivery...but the first 24 hours are pure hell. I ain't gonna lie to ya.

To be quite honest, I barely remember anything, although I know Shane left at some point, they kept waking me up to feed the baby, and I'm sure I had some visitors, and oh yeah...the pain.

THE PAIN.

I had an episiotomy and a very bad tear, it felt like they stitched me forever. Right after delivery I was so thirsty. They brought me a huge glass of water, several apple juices, and some other liquids. I guzzled them down. Then I had to pee.

"We'll need to help you to the bathroom, dear. Mothers have a tendency to pass out on us."

"Ok, whatever, but I need to pee NOW," I said.

So they help me to the bathroom. Excuse the details, but my butt was so swollen from pushing so hard. I have no idea why they tell you to push like that, because if you can feel yourself pushing through an epidural, I'm of the opinion you are pushing too hard. At least that's what my body told me afterward. At the time, you have no idea.

I sat on the toilet. Nothing happened.

"Honey, it just might not come," said the nurse.

"Oh, it will, I really have to go." I said.

"Here, I'll turn on the water." she replied kindly.

I sat there some more. I kept telling them it would come. They finally made me get off and catherized me. As if I hadn't had enough tubes shoved up me in the past 24 hours.

However, HOLY SMOKES. I shouldn't have drank that much liquid because the amount of urine that filled that huge pee hat was ridiculous. I filled it, they had to dump it and put something else there which I filled to almost overflowing and they replaced the pee hat again. My nurse said, "You weren't kidding. You really had to go."

I spent most of the first 24 hours in bed hopped up on pain meds and sitting on ice diapers. Yes, and ice diaper. It is a hemmoroid wipe wrapped around a wet frozen maxi pad that sits in a Pamper. Nice. Seriously, it was nice.

Because that's all I remember of the first 24 hours, let's skip on to Day 2....

I am a determined person. I knew my mother was going home the following Monday and my husband was going back to work and there would be no one to help me with the baby, so I was going to have to learn to do things for myself again.

The worst part was the swollen ass...walking or standing was torture, but I did it anyway. I remember how badly I wanted a shower. My OBGYN came in to visit me as I was shuffling around getting ready to make my way to the showers.

"Well, it's obvious you're feeling fine. I think you can go home tomorrow if you'd like."

YIPPEE!

While in the hospital, I dealt with several different nurses, some good, some bad, and some in between. They all had their own way of doing things and felt that I should be educated on all their ways. INFORMATION OVERLOAD. I was glad to be getting my walking papers so I could tend to my baby without the scrutiny of a floor full of know it alls. I shouldn't be so harsh, there were some great nurses, but the bad ones made it really bad.

I left after a 2 night stay and was glad to go home. It is the oddest thing when you walk in the door of your house that you lived in for 5 years with a new baby. Everything looks different. It's weird. I felt like I had just moved in.

Recovery was still happening. The struggle to pee was quickly replaced by bad brain wiring. As soon as my pants came down for any reason, my brain felt it was necessary to tell my bladder to start peeing. Sigh. Embarassing, and yet true. I peed on the floor quite a few times. (Don't worry first time pregnant mommies, the control comes back within a week. Well, most of it.)

No one told me that I would still look 5 months pregnant. It's quite distressing. And child birth is not kind to your stomach. It's a wrinkly, jiggly mess, and it stays that was for a good long time. I'm at 8 weeks and I'm still disgusted by my stomach. I keep telling myself what everyone tells me, "It took 9 months to put the weight on, give yourself 9 months to take it off."

Sigh. Easier said then done.